I don't know what it is about me, but I have a tendency to attract overt eccentrics, and I find it interesting.

This morning I opened up the card and gift shop I work at, because the manager is sick.

It was all normal routine for about an hour and a half until about 9:45am when I looked out the window to see a man swigging on white wine, looking at a few champagne glasses.

Once eye contact was made he came inside and started chatting to me.

He was so outrageously gay. As camp as a row of tents. Top deck bleached blonde hair ontop a mass of black follicles, metro glasses and a tribal tattoo on his left arm. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong, or strange about that.

But the succeeding straight forwardness of what followed, was...intriguing.

I couldn't quite understand the first sentence he made, but quickly deciphered his combination of early morning wine-breath and typically exaggerated gay accent.

He said something about the Police and that he should have given them a few words, but might have gone to prison if he'd done so.

I just smiled and nodded, looked out the door to see Graham the arcade cleaner giving me the "sucked in, bitch." eyes, and then I asked if I could grab my camera and get a shot of him.

"Why, you gonna show the Police?! "

I quickly explained that wasn't the case, but he kept talking at very close proximity to my face and I didn't get the chance.

He then said "But you know I did some time back in the Afghan jails, BUT THE SEX THERE WAS GRRRRREAT! OH BOY I LEARNT SOME THINGS THERE!!!"

"So what time do you knock off."

- ummm, I'm not sure...around...2?

"Well I can come back then and meet you down the end and we could go off into an alleyway and I'll give you a *does a blowjob gesture*!!"

"I'm not kidding, I will!!...SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?"

I didn't doubt him for a second, which made me feel like a stunned mullet.

- uhhhh....man, I don't swing that way.

"AWWW WHAT A WASTE! You'll learn one day when you're older what IT'S ALLL ABOUT!!"

I laughed a little nervously...and asked him what his plans for the day were.

"Ahh I think I'll probably go and see my Sisters grave for the second time."

"She was such a beautiful girl! Want me to show you a picture of her?"

- Yeah, why not.

"Just to give you a warning, she's dead in the photo, and I'm giving her one last kiss."

And that is exactly what he showed me as his phone wallpaper - a picture of him kissing his deceased sister on the cheek.

"I looked after her for a whole year in Afghanistan before she passed away, and my 5 beautiful nieces too."

From there he told me, as I helped him conjure the word 'appreciative' - that even if family piss you off, and get you so angry, that they're the only ones you'll ever truly love.

Bradley is the name he gave me - and to be honest - I didn't/don't know what to think of Bradley.

I mean, yeah - I'm a young guy, who smiles a fair bit...and happened to be wearing a green apron... working inside a gift shop...but do I really look that gay or stupid!!

There's people that will back me up when I say - I'm an old and gay pedophile magnet, whether I like it or not...and as uncomfortable as it can make me feel, I must share the experiences.

And to top off the day, after I finished work I met with a couple of friends and was walking down William Street when I looked into the Hungry Jack's window, and low and behold - was another seedy looking old man, standing up, staring at a news paper with a cold glaze...pinching both his damn nipples. This continued for about a minute before I crept up to the window and put my camera up to my eye and took a picture - but the damned-to-hell response action of myself to trigger to mirror meant I missed his nipple pinching fiasco.

...and ended up with this > [link] < instead.

That pretty much sums up the pinnacle of my strange, strange day.